My Palace in Dallas: Noah & Caroline Irby
As I have stated in the previous article, it is now the hot summer of 2021 and the gangs are vaxed and waxed and ready to get back out there safely (Thank you Dolly Parton). I continue to wonder, what have I accomplished this year? What random yet basic habit have I picked up on? Sourdough starters? Day drinking? Gained the quarantine 15? Learned how to give myself a haircut? Aside from all these things that helped that endless void in my heart, I’d like to believe I came out of this quarantine experience stronger and being able to appreciate the chance for total solitude.
This is the exact idea that gave birth to this project, I want to know, I want to see, more importantly I want to document what the people around me have become after this unprecedented year, they can be artists, comedians and they can also be the people you meet daily on the street (which is quite hard cause apparently people in Dallas don’t walk at all). What is it that they do? What are their stories and what does their Palace in Dallas looks like?
Without further ado, allow me to introduce you to Noah Irby, the Co-owner of Wayward Coffee in Oakcliff TX and Caroline Irby, his lovely wife who has been the voice of justice and the best ally you can find out here who I am most fortunate enough to see them in person and stalk their grams.
Hi Caroline and Noah, first of all, big congrats on the new place! And thank you for spending a little time with me and chat, I’ve always been a huge fan of Wayward and your vibe. Before I start grilling you two with my random questions, would you like to tell the people about yourself? Who are you guys and what is it that y’all do?
Caroline (Going as C for the rest of the dialogue): Hi my name is Caroline, 22, been married to Noah for two years! I am a nanny, not a lot of people actually know that unless I tell them so and I also work at The All-Good Things stationary/selected good shop in bishop arts! Still really discovering who I really am and what I like to do in my early twenties stage. I am a big plant mom even though three of them died when we moved in here but, I think that’s on them. I bake cookies quite often and I have a small goal of climbing an actual mountain before I turn 25!
Noah (Going as N for the rest of the dialogue): Hi, I am Noah, also 22, Caroline and I actually met in high school when we were 16 and it is still crazy to think about how long it has been since we’ve known each other. I am one of the owners of Wayward Coffee in Oakcliff, TX and we’ve been open for over a year now! For me, I enjoy music a lot, and I’m actually trying to write and play music a lot more. Love nature, going on trips, hiking, and just being around it with Caroline.
Throughout last year I’ve definitely had too many iced vanilla lattes to count, but what I am most curious about today is how did you got to where you guys are now, especially opening a wonderful (WONDERFUL!) coffee shop in Oak cliff at such a young age?
N: I didn’t care much about coffee until I met Trevin a few years ago working at a shop. What actually attracts me about it is the culture around it more than the drink itself and the people you would meet while running it, long story short we wanted to create that type of environment for people. Wayward was the result of a lot of opportunities that came together really fast to the point it was kind of scary cause we had to jump on things. A lot of DIY stuff from me, Trevin, and some other folks is what made this space came true. We were pretty lucky because the original location was already up to code with the city when we got it, so we skipped all the hurdles for those who try to open up, like, coffee shops. I would also say having the vision of exactly what we want to do helped us a lot, we just get in there and sweat a lot for about three months and got everything together.
For the place, it’s been over a year now since our opening, and the community, the culture around it have grown quite rapidly since then. I think it is a special place for people in Dallas and Oakcliff that are looking for a place to enjoy coffee and you know, just be. It’s like its own life form growing itself at this point especially with last year it’s cool to be a place for people to come and have some positivity in their lives.
Personally, we’ve grown in a lot of ways since last year and to be able to have each other and on the same page for who we are and who we decided to associate with is a really wonderful thing.
C: (How am I supposed to top that preacher?): For me from last year to where I am now, really took a lot of thinking. We had to let go of things that were hard to let go of and I had the time to really learn more about myself. This collective hardship really forced us to look at matters we weren’t able to tackle yet and I think doing so led me to a much better space.
Are you two Dallas locals? Among all the city in the states, what is so special about Dallas that you’ve chosen this city to be the place to stay? How do you feel about this city?
C: When I was a kid I’ve always loved Dallas and wanted to come here on the weekends, Dallas is the Newyork for the suburbs here, the big city some would say. I gravitate towards here and growing up in the suburbs, its’ the diversity and all these different people I can meet in this community that was so amazing to me. It’s a really different vibe and having a glimpse of that makes me want to stay here and have kids eventually.
Dallas is a place that really has a lot to offer but you really need to put yourself out there, and for an introverted person like me it was really hard but growing out of that self-conscious stage really opened up a lot of wonderful things for me!
N: I really loved the community here in Dallas and especially in Oak cliff, that is one of the reasons why we decided to set up shop here and to see it thriving and growing. In my opinion, this is the closest thing to having a creative hub around here, not that you necessarily need to live in the area but all the creative people gravitate towards here like even for yourself and that is amazing for me to see people come and just enjoy themselves.
There was a time when we were dead set on leaving this place cause I guess we didn’t get to experience the great things Dallas has to offer until we really stepped out and explore the city. This is a big place and once we started expanding out more or just stopped ignoring the good things it really can be a beautiful place.
It’s safe to say that we’ve made it through the worst year possible, the kings and queens and all the non-binary royalties are vaxed and waxed and ready to party. Are you excited about things opening up?
N: I’m really excited for what’s to come but the weird part for me is, despite how excited we all are for normalcy, there are still people out there still dealing with the trauma and the loss thrown upon them during the pandemic. I’m a little conflicted on how to feel about this erring feeling.
In a way, we are finally being able to breathe a sigh of relief (literally) but I do wonder how many people are out there still going through and dealing with what the pandemic has taken away from them. However aside from that I am really excited and still feeling kind of surreal to think things are finally on it’s way to normal. A little excited and conflicted at the same time for me honestly.
C: I honestly thought this will never end for a long time and I’m still not sure how to feel about it and to what Noah said, I don’t think there is a real right or wrong way to feel about it, like, it’s a new experience for everybody! We were all forced to adapt to this and now the situation changed again hopefully for the better.
What was crazy to me is for once, the world actually had a common struggle that was equally horrible for all of us, and I think that was also how I feel more connected to the local community. During the snowstorm that destroyed Dallas at the beginning of the year, I realized that literally, anything can happen and how important it is to have a robust local connection to uplift and to help one another.
For how I feel I think after all these collective traumas I often ask myself am I allowed to move on? Am I allowed to get over this and finally feel excited? The conflict is often within me especially after all the things that happened aside from the pandemic in the mix of last year, but I feel hopeful and think things are getting better and will only (hopefully) onward.
Obviously it has been a tough year for all of us in 2020 and me included have been through that emotional rollercoaster with no end in sight, and what I’m curious is, what did you do to stay happy during last year? What got you two through it?
C: Okay this might sound funny, well probably not I think this is a common thing to do when you are experiencing trauma or something out of the norm and want to escape for a little while, I’d just sit down. I would sit down and play video games as a way to turn my mind off but still somewhat occupied after I lost my job in the beginning of the pandemic. I also took a lot of time educating myself and be more involved and hands-on in all the social justice issues, making myself more aware of what is happening and being able to stand up more for people during this time. I guess what I did the most was took some time for self-discovery and breaking my old mold, baking many cookies, played a lot of video games, be a better ally for everyone, and not let it just be an insta stunt but to keep doing it moving forward.
Living with Noah is also what makes me happy throughout last year because we would play video games together and just being around each other helps a lot, I think I would lose my mind if I was living by myself, and not gonna lie I probably did Noah can testify.
One more important thing for me I think is finding things to help you decompress, and not to feel guilty about it, like, it doesn’t mean you care less about what is happening but we all need a certain activity to be able to tunnel vision on ourselves and free your head from all the problems even if it’s just for a good 30 minutes.
N: Caroline said it well *thoughtful nod, finding ways to decompress is really helpful for us throughout last year.
Ooooh I got another one, could you tell me one best thing about being one of the owners of such a cool coffee place owner?
N: I guess being able to create a space not only you are proud of but also seeing other people enjoying it as well. It’s probably one of the most fulfilling feeling to see people coming in and have a good experience. It really is a special thing to see how the space that you worked really hard on made someone’s day even just a little better. On top of that, I really love all the people we work with and we have really become a family that enjoys being around each other and working together, seeing our extended family and friends get closer is a really nice feeling too.
The regulars are also a big highlight for me, when they come in it’s always fun to catch up and have small talks with them.
(editors note: I’m literally blushing at this point, they just said they like me <3)
C: Because I also spend a lot of time in the shop it is cool how we formed a small community with the regulars and the staff around it and it always feels like a wonderful full-circle closing up when worlds collide in the shop.
And we are almost to the bottom of my list of Qs for today, for those who are interested in getting into this business or starting something of their own. What suggestions or advice you would like to give them or wish you should’ve known sooner? Either as an adult or a business owner?
N: For getting into the world of coffee it would probably be: don’t be pretentious about it. A lot of people getting into the world of coffee and they push a lot of people away who want to come there because they were really pretentious about it, unfortunately.
Like we care about the craft and serve good coffee but if you look down your nose on people’s order just because you don’t drink that I think it’s stupid, don’t do that. Welcome everyone in and help them find something they enjoy, it’s really more about the experience and the people and not about making the perfect cortado every time. Avoiding that kind of mindset has been really helpful for us because at the end of the day it is still just coffee and have fun, let people enjoy themselves.
I think being able to ask for help from people and accepting help from people is really important. When we were building the shop like I said it involves a lot of DIY and in however way people decided to help we would always say “Yeah come through”. Be free to think that you don’t have to do it all by yourself and got caught up on trying to build your own dream because everyone has something unique to bring to the table, it’s ok to accept them.
On a personal level, I think is to give yourself permission to ask more questions. For the longest time, I didn’t do that with a lot of areas in my life, I wouldn’t let my mind be opened up to certain things and was just afraid to ask certain questions or doubt them. When I finally feel like I don’t have to do that anymore like, I can start meeting new people that are different from who I grew up with or just different in general and it opened up a completely new world for me. It has been really great and freeing to be in that space. It allows you to open up to so many things the world has to offer.
C: I would say not to care too much about how people think about you, because ultimately you are the one who has to live with yourself and not them, so might as well be whoever you want to be. If they like you they’re along for the ride and if not it’s cool.
To wrap this interview up, also because I am curious personally, what’s on the horizon for Wayward? Any “Big things coming” in the works either for the shop or personally you’d like to share now that we are progressing into the post-vaccination era?
N: We have quite a few potential ideas for the shop as things are opening up, potentially expanding the space or re-do it but I’m not sure when that’s going to be. As for the more immediate future we want to start doing more events like pop-ups every other week, bring in creatives, vendors, artists as now we can actually do it safely that’s definitely something we are trying to figure out so expect a lot more community events and new things happening.
C: I’m just going to chill and start to finally relax because we’ve been constantly adapting to changes and I can finally tell myself to be happy with where we are and it’s ok to just chill out. Take a deep breath you know, I think we’ve all earned that.
Caroline Irby: https://www.instagram.com/caroline__irby/
Noah Irby: https://www.instagram.com/ididntbuildtheark/
Wayward Coffee: https://www.instagram.com/waywardcoffeeco/
In frame: Caroline Irby, Noah Irby
Photographer: James Kung
Interviewed by: James Kung
Location: Dallas, Texas