My Palace in Dallas: Bonnie Criss & Sallie Bowen

“Solitude requires you to move past reacting to information created by other people and focus instead on your own thoughts and experiences – wherever you happened to be”

— Cal Newport, Digital Minimalism

I would like to start by saying thank you to everyone who took their time to read my poorly structured interviews, the love I have gotten have been unexpected and I am forever grateful for y’all. As I have stated in the previous article, it is now June of 2021 and the gangs are vaxed and waxed and ready to get back out there safely (Thank you Dolly Parton). I continue to wonder, what have I accomplished this year? Aside from all these things that helped that endless void in my heart, I’d like to believe I came out of this quarantine experience stronger and being able to appreciate the chance for total solitude.

This is the exact idea that gave birth to this project, I want to know, I want to see, more importantly, I want to document what the people around me have become after this unprecedented year, they can be artists, comedians and they can also be the people you meet daily on the street ( which is quite hard cause apparently people in Dallas don’t walk at all). What is it that they do? What are their stories ad what does their Palace in Dallas looks like?

Without further ado, allow me to introduce you to Bonnie and Sallie, one of my favorite comedic duo in Dallas who I have the honor to call my friends and tell their stories through my lens over a full dank ass homemade ranch water.

Bonnie and Sallie taking a shot, well it’s actually our second shot, not shown in the picture is me also, holding a shot.

Hi Ladies! Looking amazing as always. First of all thank you so much for having the time and sit down with me for this little project of mine. Before we dive in would you like to tell the readers about yourselves? Who are y’all?

( B: “Yeah who the fuck am I? “)

Bonnie (Going as B for the rest of the dialogue): Hi readers, my name is Bonnie Criss, Gemini, 6ft tall with a big o’ bust. Who am I you ask? I am an actor, performer, comedian, sometimes writer, self-acclaimed social media mogul and you may recognize me on *hair flip* Tiktok. I am a part of the comedy group in Dallas called “Comedy for the Internet”. Me and my comedy partner Sallie work on all kinds of different improvising video shorts, performing as well as writing sketches. And in our spare time we drink and dance and sing like there’s no tomorrow.

Sallie (Going as S for the rest of the dialogue): Hi, my name is Sallie Rebecca Bowen, I’m a Scorpio, 5’7, I used to think I’m 5’8 but I guess I’m not. I recently was properly fitted for a bra and now I am in the right size bra, and it has CHANGED MY LIFE I am telling you. I am also a comedian, social media mogul, content creator some would say, and part of the “Comedy for the Internet as well. Bonnie and I are roommates, partners in life, in crime, and in love. We like to goof, do karaoke and have a great time giggling together.

Editor’s note – Jokes aside they prefer dicks; they live in a penis positive household.

Interlude – Their cat scratched Sallie on the thigh.

B: What a bitch/ S: Talk about somebody who needs a penis

From the beloved series of “Animal Facts” to the emotional rollercoaster you call “The Soap Puppera” and many many more skits online, would you mind telling me where did y’all get to where you are now? What was the journey of you guys being a comedian in Dallas from the ground up?

S: Well I’ve always loved creating video since I was a kid, I would use our home video camera all the time and get grounded from it cause I would curse in the video and got sleepy and leave it in the VCR and my dad would find it, (B: Sallie! You were asking for it) because I had to REVIEW MY WORK! He would hide the camera but I’d always find it.

Then I decided I would do it in a more formal outlet, so I started taking classes at the Dallas Comedy House in 2015, I know I was like I’m going to take an improv class that’s crazy! Safe to say it changed my life, met Bonnie and many great friends, moved to Dallas from Denton for it. I had an official stage to perform on and learned to embrace the weirdest part of me and be proud of them.

B: Mine is pretty similar to Sallie’s, when I was younger my biggest thing was to make people laugh cause I think it was what got people to like me. It was the thing for me like umm, like the Pavlov’s dog? I guess like a trigger would go off when I make people laugh but I never thought it would be a career for me. I didn’t know anyone in this industry aside from stand-up comedy which I don’t see myself doing.

Then I was introduced to improv after reading Tina Fey’s book where she talked about doing improv and sketches and I was like woo what that seems cool! At the time I had a friend who started taking classes at Dallas Comedy House and we shared a love for comedy, then he encouraged me to take a class and I was scared out of my mind! The stage fright was really real for me like I’ve done school plays but I’ve never performed on a stage in front of people for this, but after the classes, it just, clicked, like I feel like I found my thing!

After that I’ve just been writing, performing, doing all kinds of sketches and met people I really enjoy creating with. It was a really magical journey for me to have found something that I really enjoy and a good set of partners in comedy too.

Bonnie and Sallie reenacting the famous painting, GENISIS by Michelangelo. 2021

Would you mind sharing a bit more on your experience during your time at the Dallas Comedy House?

B: Yeah, so basically there are levels that you go through made up of improv techniques and you perform with your comedy troops throughout 7 weeks per level if I remember it correctly.

S: Like I didn’t know what to expect and for my first class that I took, it was filled with people of all ages and backgrounds. So it’s safe to say it was a really accepting and embracing environment cause everyone is equally terrified but the main thing they teach you there is to support each other and their ideas.

We have a saying before we go on stage is “I got your back” and it was literally what we do there. Those lessons also carried into all aspects of my life like supporting each other and like always make your scene partner look good before yourself. Aside from comedy you also learn a lot of things that is applicable to life. It’s like going home as cheesy as that sounds.

Bonnie and her Hubba Bubba, Sallie as a , Victorian doll.

“Sometimes as I drive down the highway I would still be in owe like, wow I actually am here now” Sallie- 2021

Are you two Dallas locals? How do you feel about this city as comedians or simply as an adult? What made you decided to stay?

B: I grew up in the suburbs up in north Dallas and I’ve always been more of a city girl and seeing people like Sallie doing cool shit like doing shows, meeting up many friends, and seeing that really made me envision living here. Those were the push I needed to get me moving into Dallas, like obviously I might want to live somewhere else in the US but for now, I don’t think I will want to live anywhere else.

For comedians Dallas is definitely a growing city, I wouldn’t say it is one of the biggest comedy hubs, but it is growing with many opportunities and I think it is a really fun city with cool communities and quite a lot of cool things to do filled with cool people like you James *smirk. (Let the record show this is not fiction I am, in fact, COOL)

S: So for me, I’m actually from a smaller town in central Texas south of Waco, school brought me to Denton and I’ve lived there for well, way too long and I was like “girl get out of here!”. So I moved to Dallas and I LOVE it here. I used to dream about living here especially when I was commuting between Denton and Dallas I’d feel like wow it would be so cool if I live here. Sometimes, I know it sounds lame but I’ll be driving on the highway looking at all the buildings and feel like “Ooooh it’s so cool that I live here!”, there’s always so much going on and so much diversity here so it is pretty neat.

I mean yeah it’s not the best city for comedy but with the pandemic, a lot of people are moving down here so it is only going to get better. I’ve always assumed I have to be in the bigger cities to make it but I think I’m gonna try to stick it out here and Dallas and make It happen.

I know that we have some really good stand-up venues or love for comedic scenes, if you don’t mind me asking for someone who’s pretty amazing at what they do, what makes the Dallas comedic scene stood out? What makes it so special here?

B: The spike of the online content and being able to post from literally anywhere on Tiktok and such really made Dallas a bigger hub for comedy cause I think it bridged the gap between the pockets all over the city. Being able to build a community or following here that enjoys comedy is also what makes us decided to make this city our hub and having this group that we enjoy creating and performing is what for me, made this place so special. Also, I’d add that with the help of TikTok it also helped to put Dallas on the map allowing peeps to know what we do here that isn’t just rodeo.

S: It will always be the people, it’s a really rare thing to find partners in comedy you can create with and also being friends in this industry. It really is the people for me.

Obviously, 2020 has been a hard year for everyone, take me for example I had several sobbing episodes under my own crappy Ikea work desk during last year. What I want to know is, while being copped up together in this house, how did y’all managed to stay happy or, remotely no sad? What got you through this year that isn’t alcohol?

S: Not going to lie it was truly the shittest year ever like, crappy crap crap. The best thing throughout last year was living with Bonnie and Mariell (another really talented artist). If I was living by myself, I might just throw myself off the cliff. Throughout last year we would play dress up, goof around, filming dumb shit, random dance parties and just finding things to entertain ourselves that made us laugh. We even each got a bike, did we ride it a lot? I can neither confirm nor deny.
B: For us is just finding anyways to entertain ourselves especially for me, I HATE being cooped up with heated passion. Thanks to our roommate we can have disco parties, we even made a fake bar at home and pretend to be bartender and giving out cards and acted like we are opening up a tab. That was a fun time, but honestly I would not want to do it again, at all.

I’ve only been to your place at night so I am really mesmerized by how this place look by day! With such a lovely place of yours what would you guys say is y’alls prized possession?

(Photos shown according to the order below.)

B:

I have a mannequin hand that was a prop for a sketch of me flossing and my arm flew off. I don’t know why but I kept this and it’s nice sometimes to you know, being touched by a mannequin hand.
I also have this sick plant that I’ve been propagating for a while and well it’s sick now but it will be planted very soon.
And a Sallie

S:

This little guy is pretty important to me cause I really like vintage old stuffs, I call him Hortance, he’s pretty sweet and have the eyes that follows you around made me feel safe.
This is also my favorite possession recently, my vanity mirror. This is where I get ready, sit here and pondering , sometimes stacked with alcohol bottles.
This karaoke microphone is what got us through the entire 2020, I got this for my birthday and it is very special to me, I love it so much.

*B: She lost it one time and was accusing all us of stealing it, it was literally accusation station.

S: And they beat me cause the karaoke got a little annoying.

B: LET THE RECORD SHOW WE DID NOT! PUT IT IN!

Before I go, I have one final serious question for you two: is there any advice you would like to give to those who are curious about being a comedian and want to get a start on in this industry? Or is there any thing you wished you could’ve known that you wanna tell your past self?

S: I would say, for anybody out there who is curious and hesitant with going into comedy? **FRICKIN DO IT,** just try it, go to some class, go see a show! It’s wonderful and it doesn’t hurt. I know it can be very scary but just remember **everyone was just as scared when they started out**.
As for my younger self, I would say to her “bitch just fricking do it what are you waiting for?” cause it took me a long time to have the courage to try and seeing many young kids coming in to try I always feel like “dang I should’ve done it a lot sooner”. Follow them dreams!
B: If I could give an advice I would also say go try some shows! There are so many comedy shows of different genre on the internet and just try writing something, film silly videos and just go with your humor flow! There really isn’t no other better time than the present. And to my younger self is, just trust your gut! You have a good gut and I try to tell that to myself too even now, just trust it, and do it. **Nike sponsor us thank you.**

Improv plays a huge part of their lives, this is Sallie announcing that she indeed, was the culprit of the mysterious murderer.

I had a lovely time with you two! Now last but not least, is there anything big or in the works for you two that you would like to let the world know? Shout into the void for me queens.

(B+S): Our group Comedy For The Internet is still making videos, we have written some longer forms so we got some stuff ready for y’all that’s not just 60s shorts!

We are going to start doing live shows in Dallas, maybe a little tour, it will be a collaborative effort with other artists maybe musicians, other comedians, and all the good stuff! S: And we would expect you to strip James.

B: I’m gonna buy a new pair of shoes soon, that’s what in the works for me. AND YOU BET I AM GOING TO DO IT.